I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
