remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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