is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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