I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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