I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
The struggles of a small town man whore
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
