Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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