The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
