that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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