is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
