are you still at the devil's house?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
