I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Nicole vs. Life
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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