i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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