I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize