I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
did you just send me my own nude
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Randomize
