I wannas sexs uuuuu
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
