My hair reeks of homosexuality.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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