Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
