He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
