I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize