you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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