whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
