So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
