real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
