i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
