Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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