whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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