Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
and she was petting her beer can
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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