We're facebook friends in real life
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
