I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I FOUND THE LEGS
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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