I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
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