he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
