i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
