just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
