'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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