So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
do herpes really smell.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
