My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
