I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
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