am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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