But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
