I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
