in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
