I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
