The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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