Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
