i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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