There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize