Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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