It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I stole a fireplace last night.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Randomize
