Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize
