what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
i believe in u and ur pee
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize