More tranny stories later!
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I showed him my bush... on skype.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
